Have you ever been in a group of friends that is too nice? You know the scene: you’re all trying to decide what to do, but everyone keeps asking, “Well what do you want to do? What do you think? Where do you want to go?”
Guilty. On one hand, it is nice that people want to consider others’ opinions before their own, but at the same time, if everyone has this mentality, no decision will ever be made!
At some point, someone has to speak up. Many definitions of assertiveness include confidence. This is an area where many of us need to grow in, because lack of confidence can really hold us back.
The process of buying a car taught me a lot about being assertive because I went car shopping by myself. I had an idea of what I was in for and knew it would take some grit to go in and not let them push me around. At one dealership, they did everything they could to keep me there, but I had already decided I would only take a test drive that day. I was very polite but also firm (being assertive does not mean being aggressive) when I told him I was not going to buy a car that day. The salesman kept pushing. I had to say “thank you for your time and help” and walk out the door. I did what I had to do and handled myself with integrity and assertiveness. It felt really good.
Maybe you’re in a different situation, but recognize your need to be more assertive. Maybe, for you, it’s in your relationships. Do you let people walk all over you? Do you have trouble saying no? Are your boundaries fuzzy? Hold the line; you’re worth it.
Maybe you need to have that hard conversation and speak up about the things that aren’t right. Maybe it’s time to cut off a relationship entirely.
Hold the line; you’re worth it.
What’s keeping you from being an assertive, confident woman? How do you think your life would change if you gained more confidence in yourself? Take a step of boldness in this area; it may be hard, but it will be worthwhile.
So, back to your group of friends … if you have an opinion, kindly share it. It will help everyone out. They will be relieved when you make a kind, executive decision.