Coffee & Conversation: How to Connect With a Friend


Like the rotating menu of lattes at Starbucks, every season has it’s own flavor of busyness. Each one can shake up our schedules (and our budgets), and life gets busy fast! My calendar is full to the brim with commitments, parties, and family trips, and my brain is reeling with dozens of Pinterest projects that will cost me approximately $1 million dollars to make but will definitely help me save money…or something.

During such times, it is all too easy to push friendships to the back burner. And even when we manage to carve out brief blocks to meet with friends for coffee or a play date at Chick-fil-a, those breaks from the craziness quickly turn into complaint sessions. We allow ourselves to vent and gripe, but we may not get around to having real, relationship-building conversations. We can lose the opportunity to be revived and refreshed by a friend and to offer her the same thing in the midst of her chaos.

Can we turn this ship around?

Here are 5 questions to steer your next friend-date out of a complainy conversational slump and into a gab session that is mutually edifying:

1. What would your ideal Saturday look like in this season? (Either in the big picture “this season of life” sense or in the small picture “this season of the year” sense.)

2. Was your family big on traditions? Any you’ve kept up yourself or are any new ones you’re trying to implement now?

3. What’s been the highlight of your week so far?

4. If you could take one thing off your plate right now, what would it be? If you could add one thing, what would it be?

5. Is there anything on your mind today, any burden you’re carrying, that it would be helpful for you to share with me?

Take the challenge to ask these questions and invest in your friendship!

You will also like 9 Qualities That Make a Great FriendshipWhy You Want to Be a Bucket-Filler Kind of FriendTake It Easy—On Your Friends5 Tips to Avoid Roommate Drama, Coffee Talk, Real Conversation with Real Women and 5 Tips for Mending Fences in Your Relationships.

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