Dr. Zoe Shaw, A Year of Self-Care

Ask Dr. Zoe, where you ask the questions, and Dr.Zoe gives the answers!

We promise this is just for the purpose of routing, we won't use it for sales or anything else.
Consent

Read other articles written by Dr. Zoe or to learn more visit drzoeshaw.com

Asked & Answered

Ask Dr. Zoe – I Don’t Desire Sex—What’s Wrong?

‘Sexless in Seattle’ Asked: Dear Dr. Zoe, For most of my adult life I’ve struggled with not being interested in sex. I’m not a victim of sexual assault or abuse, I’ve just never had much interest. This is a struggle I’ve kept to myself due to hearing comments from people like, “I’d kill myself if I didn’t like sex.” I’ve been with my husband for seven years (married for almost two), and he is so patient and kind with me. I wish it could be enjoyable, but I don’t know what to do! Help! Dr. Zoe Answered: You are not alone. Despite our sex-crazed culture, there are others who struggle with this issue as well. It actually wouldn’t be an issue at …

Ask Dr. Zoe – I Don’t Desire Sex—What’s Wrong? Read More »

Ask Dr. Zoe – What Steps Can I Take to Stop Feeling Overwhelmed?

‘Over Feeling Overwhelmed’ Asked: Dr. Zoe, Whenever I feel overwhelmed, I just want to give up. There have been things in my life (like chronic illness) that have helped me develop more grit. I now know that I can keep going if I have to, but my first reaction to feeling overwhelmed is usually wanting to quit (if possible). It’s like I just want to escape. I have learned a couple things, like telling myself if I have gotten through the things I’ve gotten through, then I can do this, too. Also, reminding myself to chunk things down into smaller steps helps. I think I see the big, overwhelming thing and feel like it’s impossible to figure out… so just doing one …

Ask Dr. Zoe – What Steps Can I Take to Stop Feeling Overwhelmed? Read More »

Ask Dr. Zoe – How Do I Leave Last Year Behind and Start Fresh?

‘Leaving the Past Behind’ Asked: Last year was emotionally draining, and I’m afraid I will carry all the stress, anxiety and tension into this year. Is there anything I can do to leave the past behind me and start fresh? Dr. Zoe Answered: Whenever someone says to me that they are worried, fearful or unsure about what they will choose to do in the future, I always stop them mid-sentence. I don’t even want to hear the rest—so stop! You are the only person in this world who controls you. You can hope and worry and wonder about everyone else’s behavior in this world except your own. You get to choose your own thoughts, behaviors, actions and ultimately your life. When you …

Ask Dr. Zoe – How Do I Leave Last Year Behind and Start Fresh? Read More »

Ask Dr. Zoe – How Do We Teach Our Kids Compassion in a Culture So Divided?

‘Concerned but Hopeful’ Asked: Dr. Zoe, As a mother and grandmother, I feel we are in uncharted territory in our culture. The innocence of children seems to be robbed from them in the world they live in, through every medium and outside influence they encounter. I believe that we can not nor should escape the culture in which we live, isolating ourselves from everyone that we disagree. But how do we as parents and grandparents protect while we prepare this young generation? How do we help them develop standards and integrity while instilling compassion and understanding within them? I think most mothers and grandmothers could sure use some guidance. Dr. Zoe Answered: I’m glad to hear that you are hopeful. Our children …

Ask Dr. Zoe – How Do We Teach Our Kids Compassion in a Culture So Divided? Read More »

Ask Dr. Zoe – How Do I Defend My Kids from their Strict Stepfather?

‘Mother of 4’ Asked: Hello, I have been battling this for quite some time and just can’t seem to make a decision. My fiancé and stepfather to my children has a problem with everything my kids do, whether it’s coming down the stairs too hard, leaving pancake wrappers in the freezer with the other pancakes, not fully picking up after themselves, where they eat, if they leave little food crumbs on their desks, if their computers are too loud, if they are talking with their friends online and he can hear it, if they don’t say ‘hi’ or ‘bye’ etc… I’m literally going crazy. He doesn’t want to be their father but he wants to teach them how to be young men. …

Ask Dr. Zoe – How Do I Defend My Kids from their Strict Stepfather? Read More »

Ask Dr. Zoe – I Struggle Making Decisions—Can I Get Over This?

‘Paralyzed by Indecision’ Asked: Dr. Zoe, I’ve always struggled with making decisions, both big and small. I’ve noticed this is a pattern in my family…both my mother and grandmother are the same way. I’ve gotten a little better, recognizing that indecision leaves me feeling paralyzed and telling myself that I can always re-adjust if a decision isn’t ideal. Why do you think making decisions feels so painful? I genuinely hate making them. And that frustrates me about myself because I know it’s not a big deal most of the time! What are some tips or things I can tell myself to work on this? Thank you! Dr. Zoe Answered: You hit the nail on the head when you mentioned the multigenerational pattern …

Ask Dr. Zoe – I Struggle Making Decisions—Can I Get Over This? Read More »

Ask Dr. Zoe – My Boyfriend Retracted His Proposal—What Do I Do Now?

‘Debra’ Asked: I am a widow; I’ve been seeing him for nine months. He asked me to marry him a couple of times joking around and I just didn’t respond because I thought it was joking. However, he proposed the last week of February and I just stood there staring with no response. He caught me off guard. They was a lot of commotion going on at the job, so I didn’t answer him right away. Later I said I loved him and I would marry him but he said I didn’t answer him when he asked so he got his answer then. I told him I loved him and wanted to marry him and he said it didn’t work that way …

Ask Dr. Zoe – My Boyfriend Retracted His Proposal—What Do I Do Now? Read More »

Ask Dr. Zoe – How Do I Create Better Boundaries with My Boyfriend and His Daughter?

‘Marie’ Asked: How can I set up boundaries without generating turmoil between my boyfriend’s adult daughter who is 25 and myself? Her Dad always takes her side and she rules him/us when she comes and visits. Thank you, Dr Zoe. Dr. Zoe Answered: It seems to me that you need to create better boundaries with two people—your boyfriend and his daughter. It’s ironic that I often get the question, “how can I create boundaries without hurting someone’s feelings or without upsetting someone?” This is the very crux of the issue for pleasers. They are more concerned about upsetting anyone than they are about caring for themselves. As long as that remains the case, your boundaries will stay low. Unfortunately, setting boundaries upsets …

Ask Dr. Zoe – How Do I Create Better Boundaries with My Boyfriend and His Daughter? Read More »

Ask Dr. Zoe – My Step-Daughter Is Acting Out and I’m Ready to Give Up!

‘crvntsfam3’ Asked: Good afternoon; I’m a 39-year-old woman and my fiance is a 50-year-old man. I have four children from a previous relationship and he has one daughter (E). It is uncommon (but becoming more common) that his daughter lives with us. She is 10 and her mom left after dropping her off for her first day of kinder. She was constantly unfaithful and had/has no desire to be a mother. She hardly ever calls and never comes to visit (she lives around 700 miles away). I’ve been in E’s life for four years now and we are experiencing some growing pains recently. She has developed a lying habit and most recently, stealing from me. Now, don’t get me wrong, if she …

Ask Dr. Zoe – My Step-Daughter Is Acting Out and I’m Ready to Give Up! Read More »

Ask Dr. Zoe – My Friend Exhibits Hurtful, Toxic Behavior. Can I Help Her?

‘Meg the Muse’ Asked: Dear Dr. Zoe, My friend of 17 years behaves in strange, hurtful ways and I don’t know whether these things could indicate some sort of personality disorder or trauma. She gives the silent treatment, pushes her friends away, accuses other people of being out to get her or of disrespecting her boundaries without saying what those boundaries are, love bombs people and then cuts them off, holds grudges, cries and is embarrassed easily, has unrealistic standards and won’t accept criticism. This has been a pattern for many years now. She still lives with her parents, hasn’t dated in 5 years and refuses to step out of her comfort zone even a little bit. I love her and want …

Ask Dr. Zoe – My Friend Exhibits Hurtful, Toxic Behavior. Can I Help Her? Read More »

Dr. Zoe Shaw is a licensed psychotherapist, educated at UCLA and Pepperdine University. She has a private practice in sunny California and a virtual practice working with people all over the world! She is a motivational speaker, podcast host, life coach, and fitness fanatic.

Dr. Zoe is also a busy wife and mama of five, which fuels her desire to help women attain the elusive balance between work, life, self, and relationships through cultivating healthy minds and bodies. Her passion is to help women find their strength, embrace it, and share it with the world. But sometimes, you just have to laugh at yourself along the way!

Do you have a burning question about yourself, your relationships, or your parenting? Send it in, and Dr. Zoe will give you spot-on advice as a life and relationship expert. But don’t worry, she’ll balance her honest answers with grit and grace.

DISCLAIMER: Not all questions will be answered. Due to volume, your question may be used at a later date. This website and its content (including any information provided by users) is for informational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended to replace or substitute for any professional medical, financial, legal, or other advice. The Company Parties (defined below) make no representations or warranties and expressly disclaim any and all liability concerning any treatment or action by any person following the information offered or provided within or through the website. If you have specific concerns or a situation in which you require professional or medical advice, you should consult with an appropriately trained and qualified specialist.
Scroll to Top