Motherhood

moth·er·hood

/muh·thr·hud/

The nurturing of children from the deepest places of your heart, rooting for them to be their best selves while allowing grace when they (or you) fall short; tired, proud, overwhelmed, joyful, amused and busy—often simultaneously 

Raise Your Boy to Become a Strong Man

Raise Your Boy to Become a Strong Man

As a mom of four boys, I am thinking of the attack on manhood lately. It seems like I know a lot of great women and not too many great, strong men. I guess it depends on what your definition of a great man is, but I think most of us can agree on what it is not. And that’s not who you want to raise your boy to be! Unfortunately, due to cultural influences and the period we live in, I believe there is a rise in the number of passive, lazy, and entitled “boys who can shave.” Men who still live in their parent’s basements play video games for as long as possible, thus putting off such beautiful privileges such […]

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Dear Stay At Home Mom: I Want You To Know These 8 Things

Dear Stay At Home Mom: I Want You to Know These 8 Things

Dear Stay-at-Home Mom, If you had told me 10 years ago that I would end up being a stay at home mom who home-schooled her children, I would have straight up punched you in the throat—then laughed. Then probably punched you again. I’m only telling you this to give you a better idea of your author. I didn’t plan on this role, but I didn’t plan on marriage or children either, and I had no idea how much they would turn my life and my heart upside down—for the better! Maybe this was always your dream, or maybe you fell into this role as I did. Regardless, if you’re a SAHM, you probably need some encouragement and, most likely, some sanity today.

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8 Children’s Books That Will Make You Laugh and Cry

During my one-year reign as an elementary school library assistant, I learned a lot about children. And books. And, of course, children’s books. I was always charmed when they tittered up to check their books out, bouncing with excitement as they mustered up all their strength to heave the books onto the counter with gusto. As I entered their information into the computer, they gleefully tapped their hands on the covers of the books and earnestly explained why they were excited about these particular choices. “My sister read this one, and it was sooo cute!” “This dog looks just like my dog at home. He’s brown with black spots, too.” “Ms. Bolen read this one on the morning news, and it was

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5 Ways to Make Parenting Your Strong-Willed Child Easier

5 Ways to Make Parenting Your Strong-Willed Child Easier

Friends, I like to think that I have a black belt in strong-willed child parenting. My oldest child is one for the record books. He’s loving, he’s kind, and he’s a joy to be around. Unless he’s ready to lock horns, at which point all bets are off and it’s game on. Parenting him has been a joy and a challenge. And after doing life with him for the past 10 years, I feel like I know at least a thing or two about how to handle him and maintain a relative amount of peace in our household. I have even managed to keep my own sanity, which as you may know is no small feat when you have a headstrong child.

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Natural Teeth Whitening—For Your Child and You

Natural Teeth Whitening—For Your Child and You

Lately, I’ve noticed my oldest son’s permanent teeth look a bit yellow compared to my other three boys, who still have their baby teeth. Of course, my first assumption was that he wasn’t brushing correctly. Or worse yet, he’s skipping his brushing altogether. But after a few weeks of supervising and not noticing a big difference, I started to do a bit of research. Apparently, baby teeth are naturally whiter than permanent teeth. One pediatric dentist explains that “permanent teeth not only have a thicker enamel, but the layer under the enamel (dentin) is also more dense. Dentin is yellow in color. This gives the permanent teeth a color slightly more yellow than the baby teeth. And it’s perfectly normal!”(¹) There is

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5 Things to Do If You're Struggling With Breastfeeding

5 Things to Do If You’re Struggling With Breastfeeding

Engorgement and cluster feeding and sore nipples, oh my! Plugged ducts and milk blebs and bad latches, double oh my! I’ll take the lions and tigers and bears any day, thank you! Breastfeeding is the hardest job nobody told you about. It’s one of the most natural things our female bodies can do, yet it definitely does not come naturally. I’ve heard on more than one occasion from moms who would rather repeat the pains of childbirth to never have to breastfeed again. Yep, sounds like this nursing gig is no walk in the park. When I gave birth to my daughter, I struggled with getting a proper latch, which made breastfeeding very painful for the first few weeks. I also dealt

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Why Do I Trust God with My Life but Still Worry About My Children?

Why Do I Trust God with My Life but Still Worry About My Children?

Last month we hit a milestone in our house and my oldest daughter got her license. And not the drive-in-the-car-with-your-mom-while-she-yells-and-hangs-on-for-dear-life kind of license. It’s the “Mom, I am taking your car to the movies and then to McDonald’s with all my friends” kind of license. And I have to be honest with you, while part of me was super excited that I could now make her drive to get all my groceries (don’t judge me), the other part of me was absolutely terrified. Like, every horrible car accident you’ve ever seen in the movies terrified. And not because she can’t drive. Trust me, I’ve got $2000 worth of Deans Defensive Driving School invested in this kid and I feel totally confident in

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10 Secrets Every Mother of the Bride or Groom Should Know

10 Secrets Every Mother of the Bride or Groom Should Know

Your son or daughter just got engaged, and you’ve officially become a MOG or MOB (Mother of the Groom or Mother of the Bride.) Congratulations! Are you excited or freaking out? First things first, take a deep breath and remember that you’ve raised them to be responsible, caring adults—even if they don’t always act like it. Before my son’s wedding, his fiancée was struggling with whether or not to wear a veil, and he looked at her and said, “Whatever it’s going to take to make you feel beautiful on our wedding day.” I was pleasantly surprised at his response and realized I wasn’t a total failure as a mother! Second, it’s easy to get distracted by details, so don’t forget that

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two boys in a grassy field throwing toy airplanes. Feature image for the article titled Old School Parenting Makes Happier Kids—and Moms

Old School Parenting Makes Happier Kids—and Moms

Recently, our neighbor across the street recounted a conversation he had with a friend about our four boys. At first, my eyes got wide imagining what he said as images of my naked 4-year-old on a skateboard speeding down our driveway last week flashed through my mind. He quickly put me out of my angst, however, by sharing with me that he tells people it’s like 1969 at our house. I laughed in relief but then said, “Wait, what do you mean?” He smiled and responded, “Your boys are always outside, always laughing and dirty and don’t even know what a video game is! I love it! Reminds me of my childhood.” Such kind words. I wish my kids didn’t know what

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How to Teach Your Child Not to Hold Prejudices 2

How to Teach Your Child Not to Hold Prejudices

Why does it feel so uncomfortable to talk about race and racism in this country? Deep down in our gut, we know something just isn’t right and that makes us squirm. Humans strive for internal consistency, and when it’s not there we become uncomfortable. A part of our mind knows that we are all one family: the human race. The other part knows that we harbor some racism, stereotypes, prejudice, or discriminatory thoughts. Yes, we do. This makes us uncomfortable. When we become uncomfortable, we actively avoid situations and information likely to increase it. So, it’s normal to feel that way. I invite you to feel it now and keep reading anyway. There is something called multigenerational transmission process, which just means

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I'm a Busy Mom—How to Give Back When My Plate Is Full

I’m a Busy Mom—How to Give Back When My Plate Is Full

It’s 8:15 p.m. and you’ve been up for 16 ½ hours. Your day started with coffee, Bible, packing lunches, showers, makeup, actually making yourself presentable, signing agendas, looking over homework, ironing, dressing, brushing, constantly “motivating,” maybe even a little wrestling. In the car, you give a rundown of the day, quizzing, reminding, praying, consoling, and encouraging. You drop the kids off and are filled with anxious emotions: “Are they okay? Will they do their best? Will they make good choices? Will they….” You fill in the blank, I’m a busy mom. At work, you assume the position of friend, advisor, encourager, listener, decision-maker, supporter for people you spend more time with than your own family, and leave over 8 hours later with

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8 Guilt-Free After-School Snacks For Your Littles

If your kids are like mine, they come home from school hungry! I’ve been working a lot on packing healthy lunches for them, and consequently on providing healthy after-school snacks for when they get home. If you’re out of after-school snack ideas, here are a few oldies (but goodies!) and a few new ideas for you to try with your kids! Variations of “ants on a log.” I bet we can all remember having a celery stalk with peanut butter and raisins, but you can also halve a thick carrot and add the toppings the same way! Try a different kind of nut butter (or sun butter) for a new flavor, add honey if your sweetie likes sweets, and if your kids

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What Happened When This Mom Stopped Doing All the Things

What Happened When This Mom Stopped Doing All the Things

“Ryan! You need to unload the dishwasher!” I could seriously feel my patience slipping away as I yelled upstairs to my 12-year-old son (for the 17th time today). It was already one of those days, and it really wouldn’t take much more to push me over the edge. “I should just do it myself,” I thought, tempted to lose the battle and try again tomorrow. The last thing I wanted was a fight. But then again, his future wife wouldn’t thank me.  Okay, I know it’s a stretch, but let me explain. I’m trying something new here. By now, I mean that I’ve failed at it 100 times already and today I’m starting fresh. Again. And I’m hoping (and praying) it’s all

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Here’s How to Help Your Kids Fight a Cold Naturally and Quickly

Here’s How to Help Your Kids Fight a Cold Naturally and Quickly

Oh no… The dreaded sneeze, sniffle, or fever has made its first appearance. Immediately your mama’s mind fills with questions: Are they getting sick? What kind of sick is it? Where did they get it? Did we expose anyone else? Are their siblings acting sick? Can I keep them from getting it? Can I avoid getting it? Do I need to cancel our upcoming plans? How long will we be quarantined? How can I help my kids fight a cold? And then, the most important question that we will cover today: What can I do to help kids fight a cold naturally and cure it quickly? I’m not a doctor, but I will say that over the course of the last seven

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Have You Waited Too Long to Thank Your Mom?

Dear Mama, I’ve been cleaning up the Christmas tree this week, sweeping pine needles and thinking of the things I’ve never said to you. They are the very things no one says to me, that I would so love to hear. I’m late telling you what I’m about to write. Really late. I have grandchildren now. But I hope that “better late than never” holds. Thank you for all the years upon years of Christmases when you decorated the house and the tree, cooked the holiday meals, shopped for the gifts, set it all up, took it all down, and cleaned it all up by yourself. Christmas is a lonely time for mothers, I think. So much to do, and so much

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To the Mom Who Feels Like It Never Ends

These are the words I have found myself speaking over and over in my head: the bills. The chores. The driving. The working. The hustle and bustle of each day. They can often seem never-ending. Sometimes, like the other day while loading the dishwasher, I even let the actual words slip out of my mouth. “It never ends.” As I uttered those three small words so effortlessly, they echoed in my ears. It was almost as if the words were on repeat. Because, the truth is, the words are an accurate reflection of how I’ve been feeling on a regular basis lately. I’m tired. I’m worn out. I’m overwhelmed. I feel each and every syllable of this phrase, as I try to

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How One Secret Santa Saved the Day

How One Secret Santa Saved the Day

I was sitting in the parking lot of the grocery store waiting for the hour I could visit my daughter in the hospital when I got the second call. I recognized the number from a voicemail I had received the day before, so I answered the phone. A man said, in a very low, gruff voice, this secret Santa said, “Ho, Ho, Ho! Merry Christmas! You have a package under the Courtyard at Sherman Oaks sign.” Then he abruptly hung up. I was annoyed. I was angry. I was in the midst of the most devastating time of my life and this freak was prank calling me. My eight-year-old daughter was across the street in the inpatient psychiatry unit at UCLA medical

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