Dan and I both marvel at how easy it was to transition from widowhood to being married again—almost as if we’d known each other all our lives.
And oh, the joy of remarrying later in life. Because when you lose a good thing, and when goodness eventually replaces the loss, it seems so much sweeter.
It’s not that I meant to take anything for granted in my first marriage. But as the years passed, I got used to the stability and the faithfulness and the companionship.
And then I found myself doing road trips alone. And snowshoeing the trails in the Cascade Mountains alone. And holding Friday date night alone (I know… weird, but it was part of my brave-making campaign as a widow).
And now …
… the astonishment of a road-trip companion—exploring far-off places and still liking each other after six weeks in a small van.
… the glee of having someone who enjoys being outdoors as much as I do—hiking, camping, kayaking. No need to call a friend to let her know what trailhead I was at, and that if she didn’t hear from me in four hours, to send out a search party.
… the delight of cooking for two. Because when you’re single, it’s more like a salad or watermelon for dinner. Or popcorn. And now the delight of conjuring up meals with this man who loves to eat.
… the enchantment of gardening together. Alone, yard work is yard work. And when you’re young and married and having babies, yard work is one more thing to check off your to-do list. But later in life, there is pleasure in planting trees together, and digging a dry creek and lining it with stones, and building a whimsical, little bridge across it—together being the operative word.
… the marvel of conversations, of knowing I can say anything to this man, and he will guard it closely.
… the pleasure of being held and adored, sharing our own little signals and hints and mysterious smiles, knowing I can make this man laugh as he makes me laugh.
Helper, Rescuer, Protector—Your Role in Marriage
Genesis records God using His creativity and then surveying all He had made. He noticed one thing that was not good and then came up with a solution: “Then the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.’” – Genesis 2:18
You’ll be interested to know that the original Hebrew word for “helper” is ezer, which means, “help, rescuer, protector.”
When God saw that Adam was lonely, He didn’t create a maid, cook, and dishwasher. He created someone who would be fiercely protective of love and family and home. He created someone who would come alongside the man—not as subservient but as rescuer. BibleStudyTools.com notes that women were created as an extension of God’s strength and help for man, a position of honor.
Oh, the joy (astonishment, glee, delight!) of coming alongside a good man with our combined years of experience and wisdom—not just for our pleasure and joy, but also for the pleasure and joy of serving others. Together.
No matter your age, marriage takes work. Here’s how to build a strong union for life: 9 Principles to Build a Strong Marriage (Even Through the Storms) – 225