Surrendering to God in Hardship Doesn’t Mean Giving Up
A storm was raging above us as I held my daughter, hunkered down in our crawlspace. WA tornado warning had been issued a few minutes before, and to my ears, it sounded like it was passing right over us. The wind and the rain were terrifying.
I had no control over the preservation of our home, nor the safety of our lives. I had done the one small thing I could—get to safety—and the rest was up to God. I knew surrendering to God was the right decision, even as I was shaking with fear. And so I did.
I couldn’t call to mind the perfect worship song or the perfect scripture to recite. But the truth of God’s Word is planted in my heart, so I simply prayed, professing who I know He is, confessing my fear, and committing to trust Him in whatever outcome. I reminded myself over and over that God is good, that God is good to me, and that even if the worst-case scenario should play out, who God is remains unchanging.
Swept Up in Anxiety
A while back, God brought my attention to Philippians 4 and its anti-anxiety prescription: “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.” He taught me that when I bookend my anxious prayers with praise, it is a powerful weapon. I’ve put this to the test several times and found that it does work.
I feel anxious about short-term problems that may throw a wrench in my day but have a fairly minimal impact on life overall. But I feel panicked about big issues that throw my whole life into upheaval. The panic scenarios are permanent or long-lasting. They represent things I’ll have to navigate day after day, things that have physical and emotional fallout for weeks, months, even years to come.
The two major triggers lately are tightly woven into the fabric of my reality:
- Nighttime text messages from my family, because it’s been less than a year since my mother’s final battle against cancer and only a few months since my grandmother’s sudden passing.
- Severe weather warnings, because twice in the last few months our weather has gone from 0 to tornado with almost no warning. I’m a Pacific Northwest girl, and I’ve come to learn that I’ll take any other natural disaster; I draw the line at tornados.
When I experience one of these triggers, I go into fight or flight so fast that it takes an extra degree of intentionality to break out of the cycle. What God has shown me most recently is that when I’m feeling powerless and panicked, I need to surrender my will, embrace His, and choose to trust that His goodness is greater than my circumstances.
You Can’t Do Anything Anyway
Not to be discouraging, but often when we’re overloaded and panicked, there’s nothing we can do anyway. We can’t control people, death, or the weather. What we can control is how we choose to surrender.
God’s will always wins out. Our surrender is alignment. Surrender is accepting His sovereignty, goodness, and provision in our lives, regardless of our immediate circumstances. Because here’s the thing: Sometimes, God’s will does not feel good to us. It’s terrifying, heartbreaking. Even when we can’t do anything, we still want to fight.
Some of the things we encounter in this life are not good for us. Good may come out of it, eventually, but a bad thing is a bad thing. It doesn’t need to be rebranded as a blessing in disguise or God’s mysterious working. Surrender says, “I trust You, Lord, to do something good, even if it doesn’t feel good to me.”
How Do We Surrender?
The act of surrender can be hard. Merriam Webster’s definition is “to yield to the power, control, or possession of another upon compulsion or demand.” Surrender isn’t just inaction or going with the flow; it’s putting ourselves under the authority of another (God). Surrender is the act of giving up our autonomy, which at least in Western cultures is something to be avoided at all costs.
When I surrender to God’s will, I’m not just crossing my arms and pouting while His will plays out around me. Instead, I look for the ways He wants me to act in alignment with His will. The place it begins is in prayer, acknowledging God’s authority and His power over all things. We pray with David, “Into Your hand I commit my spirit; You have redeemed me, O LORD God of truth (Psalm 31:5).” And sometimes, we pray that prayer about our loved ones, more than ourselves.
Some of the things we encounter in this life are not good for us. Good may come out of it, eventually, but a bad thing is a bad thing. It doesn’t need to be rebranded as a blessing in disguise or God’s mysterious working.
I wish surrender was a one-and-done kind of thing, that I could acknowledge my lack of control, profess God’s authority, and move on with my life. But as summer storms keep reminding me, surrender is a choice that I have to make each day, and sometimes for each situation.
Thankfully, Scripture is full of reminders and professions of God’s faithfulness, trustworthiness, and steadfast love. We aren’t throwing ourselves at the feet of someone who may or may not care what happens to us. We are throwing ourselves at the feet of a Father-God who loves us more than we can imagine.
When the Outcome Isn’t What You Prayed For
Once we’ve reminded ourselves that we know the One who is in control, we choose to trust Him. In Psalm 31:14-16 David prays, “But I trust in You, O LORD; I say, ‘You are my God.’ My times are in Your hand; rescue me from the hand of my enemies and from my persecutors! Make Your face shine on Your servant; save me in Your steadfast love!”
It’s not wrong to ask for a certain outcome while surrendering. In the garden, Jesus asked to be spared from the cross. The distinction is submission to God’s will, even when the outcome isn’t what we wanted or prayed for.
In other situations, such as sick loved ones and scary weather, we don’t have a choice of whether we will walk in God’s will or not. My mom and my grandma both died, and that is my reality now. I can’t move my house out of a tornado’s path. Surrendering to God’s will in these situations looks like continuing to praise Him and proclaiming His steadfast love, regardless of what happens.
At the end of Psalm 31, David writes, “Be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart, all you who hope in the LORD (vs.24).” Beside this verse, I have the following note: “Hope leads me to courage and strength of heart, but how? Hope is coming back to the Bible, worshiping, praying, seeking, even when I feel disappointed or discouraged.”
I think surrender works the same way. It’s coming back to God as often as necessary, reminding myself of His authority and control. Confessing my fears and asking God to help me accept whatever His will is.
Finding Peace in Surrendering to God
God’s will feels hard sometimes. The last couple of years have felt full of death and disease for my family. It feels especially hard to surrender in these situations. It almost feels wrong to pray, “Lord, Your will be done,” about someone else’s sickness. It can feel like what I’m saying is, “Lord, if You want to take them to heaven now, that’s fine by me.” Which is a) not how I feel at all and, b) kind of not my place. I can’t surrender on behalf of anyone else.
But here’s the thing: When we don’t admit our lack of control and surrender to God, we can’t find peace. We hang on to a sense of pressure to do something to make the situation better, even as our rational minds scream that there’s nothing we can do. Sometimes, God’s will takes someone out of our lives. We can’t surrender on their behalf, but we can surrender the grip we have on them.
This is true whether our loved one is sick, walking in rebellion, or sheltering with us from a storm. Surrender demands that we loosen our grip on whatever we’re holding on to. But we have assurance that God does not leave us empty-handed.
Strength to Weather the Storm
I think sometimes we—or at least I—assume that successful surrender or a victory over anxiety and panic means that we don’t feel the impact of it. But it’s not that way for me, at least not currently. God and I are side-by-side fighting against the darkness, His strength sustaining me through the battle and giving me just enough to make it through the rest of the day.
If you’re in a similar situation, let me just say that it’s not wrong to physically feel your anxiety or panic. That’s just one more thing we don’t have much control over. As we heal from the traumas, I believe we’ll have more distance to be able to intercept the anxiety and panic and surrender before it derails our day. But when it’s raw, our nervous systems kick in, just the way God designed them to.
He knows our biology. He does not hold it against us. He invites us to bring the whole mess to Him for help. He will fight by your side through the darkness, He will give you strength to get through the rest of the day—even if that means snuggling on the couch watching a movie.
Sometimes we surrender and find that God removes the storm. And sometimes we surrender and find that we still have to walk through the agony. But surrender reminds us that we are not alone. The God who is in control over all things is the same God who walks beside us and carries us when it gets too hard. Surrendering to God is resting in His arms.
—
Anxiety may still creep in, even after you surrender. Caroline Beidler, MSW, joined the Smart Living with Grit and Grace podcast to share practical ways she overcame her own struggle with anxiety. Listen here: Living with Anxiety? Bring It Into the Light and Find Hope with Caroline Beidler – 235
