What to Do in the Face of Election Stress and Political Division

Perhaps it is cliché to say that I have never seen America more divided during an election season, but it sure seems that way. Whether it’s because America is at a crossroads or because social media amplifies it more than ever before, I can tell you that I am saddened and exhausted by the election process. As I scroll, I see friends slinging mud at each other and opposing viewpoints. I see friendships broken. I see divides. I see hate. I see self-righteousness.

I don’t see love or respect.

I was raised in a very political family. We regularly engaged in lively debate around the dinner table, watched and discussed the news, went to fundraisers and rallies for candidates from local, to state, to national government positions. From a very young age, the importance of the political process was impressed upon me.

When I became a military spouse, that became amplified as each political decision had a direct impact on my way of life. Everything from a conflict to a war to a budget had far-reaching implications for not just my family, but military families across the world.

All Sides Deserve a Seat at the Table

Even now, I am honored and proud to say that I am still an informed and educated person when it comes to politics, but more than that, the political process. I am at a unique place in my life due to past experiences that allow me the distinct honor of using my voice on Capital Hill to advocate for change through meeting with elected officials and their offices on both sides of the political divide. I meet with both Republicans and Democrats, and while we might not see eye to eye on many things, I respect them and their elected positions. Maybe I didn’t put them in that position, but the majority of the voters did.

I have learned to put my own individualized values aside so that I can use my voice to represent the needs of other surviving spouses. I recognize that I represent other surviving military spouses on both sides of the political process for the common goal of helping all. I have learned to respect and listen to other viewpoints that I have not considered before. I have been given the opportunity to spend time with those of different experiences that have allowed me to see things through a different lens. I understand things that I would not have understood otherwise.

My heart hurts as I realize that, while different, we are so similar, and yet I was dismissive. I recently had one of those experiences as I worked on the Hill this summer. As I sat in a meeting and listened to the story of another, I was struck that, by making one decision, her life turned out exceedingly different than mine. She lost more than I did. She suffered more than I did. And yet there we sat, completely different and yet choosing to take the day to work together for the benefit of all.

You Don’t Need to Change, But You Should Try to Understand

As we near the final stretch of election season (Thank. Goodness!) I would encourage everyone to take a step back and take a moment to see your friend, your neighbor, your acquaintance, your colleague as a person of value. We all walk different paths and are at different places in our journey that allow us to have incredibly individualized outlooks on the world around us.

I would encourage you to sit down and talk about why they feel the way that they do. This is not a debate. This is a conversation and a show of goodwill during a time where we are seeing little being offered.

Extend some grace to those around you and allow yourself to grow and appreciate what and why they are passionate about fill-in-the-blank. I am not asking you to change positions. I am not asking you to change political parties. Instead, I am asking you to allow yourselves the opportunity to grow in your understanding of the person sitting across from you.

You still may disagree, but at least you will understand why they feel that way. That understanding will function as a bridge to strengthen your relationship instead of burning it.

(Photo by Element5 Digital)

—
Feeling election stress? Regardless of whichever end of the political spectrum you find yourself, discussing opposing views can be overwhelming. This podcast episode, although intended for mothers, will help you approach these discussions with grace and respect: How Do I Raise My Kids when the Culture and Bible Collide? with Dr. Jim Denison – 177