Motherhood

moth·er·hood

/muh·thr·hud/

The nurturing of children from the deepest places of your heart, rooting for them to be their best selves while allowing grace when they (or you) fall short; tired, proud, overwhelmed, joyful, amused and busy—often simultaneously 

As Teens Grow Away, You Can Still Stay Connected. Here’s How

As Teens Grow Away, You Can Still Stay Connected. Here’s How

Recently, our oldest child made the leap from high school to college. And I don’t mean college a couple of hours away—I mean really away. She has had it in her head for a long time that she wanted to be in Florida (and not just for college, but permanently) so off she went from Virginia Beach to Miami Beach. In just a few days’ time, our family dynamic changed, and we all felt it. My husband suffered the most, really feeling gutted that his baby was gone. He would comment about her car not being in the driveway, missing her late-night pass throughs to chat while we struggled to keep our eyes open, and even having extra food left over at […]

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little girl holding up a colorful construction paper turkey for thanksgiving as a sweet gesture amid the mayhem of motherhood

Mommas, Allow Thanksgiving to Nourish your Soul

Mayhem ran amuck as I scurried to get my children ready for an appointment. I barked orders to my older children while attempting to subdue my toddler, who gleefully ran away from me naked as a jaybird. “Are you brushing your teeth?” I yelled up the stairs, still struggling to put a diaper on my son, which was about as easy as wrestling an alligator. When he was finally dressed, I popped him on my hip to deter any further escape, and hurried upstairs to check on my 5 and 6 year olds. Do you think they were obediently dressed and ready for the day? Nope, of course not. In normal 5-year-old fashion, the toys I had neatly put away the night

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8 Things Moms Should Say to Raise Strong Kids

Say These 8 Phrases to Raise Strong Kids

In their most powerful form, words have the ability to shape one’s character, self-esteem, and relationships. They can impact us for better or worse for the rest of our lives. As moms, our words in particular shape our children, and the longer my motherhood journey continues, the more I discover this to be true. I’ve witnessed the positive impact of my words—evidenced by my girls’ grins, hugs, and outward joy—as well as the pain that my words can illicit, spoken in the moments of impatience or anger. Both can have a lingering effect. If you’re like me and looking to add more life-giving phrases to your everyday vernacular, here are 8 things (outside of “I love you”) you should consider saying to

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Natural Teeth Whitening—For Your Child and You

Natural Teeth Whitening—For Your Child and You

Lately, I’ve noticed my oldest son’s permanent teeth look a bit yellow compared to my other three boys, who still have their baby teeth. Of course, my first assumption was that he wasn’t brushing correctly. Or worse yet, he’s skipping his brushing altogether. But after a few weeks of supervising and not noticing a big difference, I started to do a bit of research. Apparently, baby teeth are naturally whiter than permanent teeth. One pediatric dentist explains that “permanent teeth not only have a thicker enamel, but the layer under the enamel (dentin) is also more dense. Dentin is yellow in color. This gives the permanent teeth a color slightly more yellow than the baby teeth. And it’s perfectly normal!”(¹) There is

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Using the Halloween Season to Teach Life Lessons

I love October, but admit I don’t get into all the spooky and haunted hype around Halloween. When my husband and I first had our children, we discussed what level, if any, our involvement would be in the holiday. He grew up the son of a pastor who did not take any part in it. I grew up having the fun of dressing up, trick-or-treating, and going to parties, even though I was never attracted to the darker side of the celebrations. Our solution? We landed on the choice to allow our family to take part, but with a certain perspective and set of guidelines in place. Many houses in our neighborhood go above and beyond with Halloween décor, incorporating gory scenes,

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Why Do I Trust God with My Life but Still Worry About My Children?

Why Do I Trust God with My Life but Still Worry About My Children?

We hit a milestone in our house when and my oldest daughter got her license. And not the drive-in-the-car-with-your-mom-while-she-yells-and-hangs-on-for-dear-life kind of license. It’s the “Mom, I am taking your car to the movies and then to McDonald’s with all my friends” kind of license. And I have to be honest with you, while part of me was super excited that I could now make her drive to get all my groceries (don’t judge me), the other part of me was absolutely terrified. Like, every horrible car accident you’ve ever seen in the movies terrified. And not because she can’t drive. Trust me, I’ve got $2000 worth of Deans Defensive Driving School invested in this kid and I feel totally confident in her

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Invite Your Foster or Adopted Child to Co-Pilot Their Life

Should You Invite Your Foster or Adopted Child to Co-Pilot Their Life?

Every foster or adoptive parent understands the extreme need for control that our trauma-surviving children often exhibit. Arleta James, the author of The Science of Parenting Adopted Children, describes this battle for control, writing “We really aren’t going to ‘out control’ these kids. They have an advanced degree in control, a Ph.D. We are undergraduates!” My husband and I found this to be so true as we parented our foster and now adopted daughter. We understood her need for control came out of a necessity of surviving her early years. However, she also needed to know we were in control in order to feel any kind of stability in our home. Using an airplane metaphor, we maintained control as pilots, but brought

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29 Easy Steps for Grocery Shopping With Kids

29 Easy Steps for Grocery Shopping With Kids

You’re the mother of two or three small children and you need to make a quick run to the grocery store. Grocery shopping with kids isn’t something you do on a whim. You start planning in the wee hours of the morning before the kids are awake. Or maybe even the night before. Step 1: Assemble outfits. You dig through the laundry basket that’s been sitting on your dresser for three days and find clothing, which basically matches. You also set aside any articles of clothing you come across that your children grew out of 6 months ago. Step 2: Locate matching shoes and socks. You may or may not be successful on this one. Keep in mind that socks don’t technically

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Raise Your Boy to Become a Strong Man

Raise Your Boy to Become a Strong Man

As a mom of four boys, I am thinking of the attack on manhood lately. It seems like I know a lot of great women and not too many great, strong men. I guess it depends on what your definition of a great man is, but I think most of us can agree on what it is not. And that’s not who you want to raise your boy to be! Unfortunately, due to cultural influences and the period we live in, I believe there is a rise in the number of passive, lazy, and entitled “boys who can shave.” Men who still live in their parent’s basements play video games for as long as possible, thus putting off such beautiful privileges such

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How to Get Your Teen to Talk to You

As the year dwindles, I’m holding tightly to the moments in the car on the way to and from school each day. This is the last semester I will be driving him to school, not only will I not get to spend that added time with him, but I’m going to miss the talks we have in the car. When my teen gets in the car, he starts talking—not one-word answers or incomprehensible sounds, but full-on talking until we get home. We’ve worked on our relationship together to be able to communicate better. As a mom, there are times I want to fix all his problems, but I’ve found that most of the time he just wants a sounding board. He wants

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flat lay of a baby onesie, pregnancy test and other items that indicate you're ready to be a mom

Ready to Be a Mom? 4 Ways to Know

I feel like this can’t start without a full disclaimer: The decision to have kids, become a mother or start a family is a call you should ultimately make yourself with the kind support of your husband and Lord’s guidance. Personally though, I was able to identify several things along the way that I would call my guiding lights. They were signs to me that the time has come; that I am ready to be a mom, and that the Lord’s plan for us is to start growing our family. You know, even as a very blessed woman living in a loving marriage, there were times when I still hadn’t been quite sure if the time was right—and then it clicked and

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Take It Easy—On Your Kids

Take It Easy—On Your Kids

So you want to be a great mom. I’m sure there are some days you think the world expects you to be a perfect mom. Well, some people do expect that from you, those silly folks. They will also tell you that your child needs to tow the line with the expectations placed by the powers that be. But I’m telling you, no they do not. While we want to help our children grow up to be productive, loving, kind adults, we don’t want to force them into a one-size-fits-all little person. There are some things that the clamoring masses tell us we should deal with in our children that just aren’t true. The challenges you face with your little person may well be

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14 Ways to Save Time and Money on Family Meal Planning

14 Ways to Save Time and Money on Family Meal Planning

When I first became a stay-at-home mom, my children were younger and fairly easy to please. At the time, I had an infant, a two-year-old, and two in elementary school. Family meal planning was virtually stress-free because my girls would pretty much eat whatever was in front of them. My kids were great at giving me a false sense of what homemaker life would be like. Eventually, they went and did what every child in the history of children has done: they got older. And with that, my days of making small, simple meals every night went right out the window. I didn’t realize an eight-year-old girl could eat like a teenage boy! Not only was my growing family draining my pantry,

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author Kathy Izard with her pair of Mommy and Me books

Love Mommy and Me Books? Add This Pair to Your Shelf

When looking for Mommy and Me books, typically people are talking about titles that can be shared aloud with children. But as a mom of four daughters and grandmother to two grandsons, award-winning author Kathy Izard had a different idea.  “I started thinking about how great it would be if families could be sharing books on the same topic by the same author, written for different age groups,” she said. Her first pairing was her memoir about homelessness, The Hundred Story Home, along with an illustrated book for children, A Good Night for Mr. Coleman. The books were published three years apart, but families, schools and churches have used them to discuss homelessness and how one person can make a difference. Mommy

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Get Your Teens Off Screens

5 Ways to Get Your Teenager Off Screens Now

My oldest son has the most beautiful head of blonde hair I have ever seen. I know this is an odd statement, but it’s true. I have been stopped by strangers in public who compliment me on his cool hair, even though he is past the cute baby stage and well into the gangly preteen years. It’s the envy of his friends (I’m not lying about this,) and a color many women pay hundreds of dollars to maintain. But for me personally, I’m tired of seeing it. Let me rephrase. I’m tired of seeing just the very top of his hair as he stares down, neck craned in that awkward “I’m staring at my phone” posture. I want to see his eyes.

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This Mom Is Sending out an SOS That Will Make You LOL

This Mom Is Sending out an SOS That Will Make You LOL

In the spirit of keeping it real with you, I thought I’d write today on how much of a hot mess I am. Side note, it’s currently 3:53 pm (I like to call this time the witching hour in our house), and I’m hiding in a dark room listening to my 5-year-old “make juice” for supper. If you already have kids then you know how bad this is and if you don’t, then let me tell you, it’s bad. I just don’t have the energy today to stop him. And I’m in over my head. It probably started last night but it’s all kind of a blur right now. I went to visit a friend’s new place after dropping my teenage daughter off

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This Kind of Love is What Makes a Mother's Legacy

This Kind of Love Is What Makes a Mother’s Legacy

It was 1914 when President Woodrow Wilson proclaimed Mother’s Day a national holiday. Each year the second Sunday of May is appointed as a day of celebration, set aside to honor the ladies in our families who have taken on the task of motherhood. An honor much deserved and earned daily by the mothers who fulfill this vital role. Whether she is a biological, foster, step, or adoptive mom, all mothers have offered a glimpse into the “love chapter” in the Bible, 1 Corinthians 13. This portrait of perfect love can be seen through these imperfect ladies in the things they do daily. From their simple acts and unrelenting patience to their profound endurance, mothers exemplify the impact of love. These are the days

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