What if everything we read on Facebook were true? I recall a post in my newsfeed that said something to the effect of, “if it’s over for ‘Bennifer’ (Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner), then there’s no hope for any of us.”
Marriage is hard work. That’s true. And some marriages just don’t survive. But to exploit this attitude of defeat based on one Hollywood couple is quite bizarre. I mean, they aren’t exactly the first famous couple to get divorced…
But, perhaps that’s part of the problem. We look at these glamorous lives and really believe that these people have it all together. They have money, fame, and people at their beck and call. Wouldn’t that make any marriage easier? Someone to cook dinner for my family or enough money to eat out anytime, anywhere I wanted? Yes, please!
And yet, it doesn’t seem to work that way. Even people who have it all sometimes don’t have the one thing that’s needed to stay together…that dig in your heels commitment to the vows taken before God, family, and friends.
We are too easily defeated; give up too soon. It’s a shame.
Separation and/or divorce may be warranted. Abuse and unfaithfulness often leave women with no choice but to leave their spouse.
But sometimes we just need to be reminded. Reminded of why we married our husband in the first place. I’m sure he’s changed (so have we). Life has happened. The good, the bad, and the ugly. You’ve been hurt, discouraged, and wondered whether or not it’s worth the fight.
It’s worth it.
It’s worth it because you decided once upon a time that you would commit your life to this person. You promised. You made one of the most sacred vows a woman can make. The fairy tale prince may no longer charge in on his white horse. Your castle may be quite smaller and not as well decorated as you had imagined. Your chariot may be a minivan, and there is no one to clean up after you or nanny your kids or even a fairy godmother to make your wishes come true.
But you promised. And no matter how tough it gets, you are not one to let life defeat you or cause you to go back on your word. You are strong and able. Dig deep. Then dig deeper.
It’s unfortunate for “Bennifer” and their family. But, maybe your simple, non-famous, non-glamorous life with your non-movie star husband is really all you need after all. You can win at this thing called marriage.