For years I struggled. When I say struggled, I really mean I struggled. “How much?” you may ask. Well, by the time I was in my early 20s I had pretty much settled on the thought that I was set out to be just a supporter to an incredibly talented, do-it-all husband (can you tell I was jealous of him at one point?), a mom, and have a job I was OK at…basically I would be the one sitting on the sidelines watching everyone else be amazing!
I know I can’t be the only one that felt unfulfilled, as if something were missing. Like I had something inside of me, something I needed to be doing, something that wanted to burst at the seams and flow right out of me. Because I knew I didn’t have my “life together,” fears and lies pushed me to suppress any dream and any hope of dreaming.
Do you know how many times I woke up and saw someone else living out those things I had hidden in my heart? It ate me up inside and knowing I wasn’t even making an effort felt even worse. At one point, I convinced myself that if I was meant to do something great, it would just sort of happen and God would cause it to simply fall in my lap.
The Turning Point
Until, one day, those desires within me became agonizing frustrations that would not let me continue to live. It’s as if I could no longer stand in my own way, but my mind was still trapped in confusion. Where do I start? Or better yet, how the heck was I going to do this?
See, I had not witnessed many successes in my life. No successful marriage or business, I didn’t come from a home that was filled with much aspiration. Frankly, it was the opposite. I grew up in a home with a single mother who had a broken spirit, who had very little self-worth and got stuck in life very early on. She had many dreams but couldn’t obtain the strength to accomplish them, and she sadly passed a lot of her thought patterns onto me.
I finally came to terms with the fact that God had truly deposited something in me. Something He wanted me, specifically, to live out. I had to accept that I was worth having a dream and it was OK to embrace it. When I finally understood that my feelings of agony were from me suppressing what God had given me, it changed me. It unleashed a confidence and trust in God like never before. I no longer needed to figure it all out, I just needed to start. Just like that, I did, and it’s the reason why I am even here writing and sharing this with you today!
When I finally understood that my feelings of agony were from me suppressing what God had given me, it changed me; unleashing a confidence and trust in God like never before. I no longer needed to figure it all out, I just needed to start.
There Is a Plan for You
God tells us in Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” What does this mean? It means that those dreams, those urging desires to open your own business, start a blog, or write a book, have been planted in you with a reason. Even better, it is backed up by God for not just your good but all those around you. Thank you, Jesus!
Let me tell you that no one ever got anywhere in life without action, so that dream you have just needs a game plan to start.
You may say, “Claudia, but I’m a mess, so imperfect,” or, “I’m afraid of failing; I can’t do this.” I can totally, 100% get that! No seriously, I can. I became a mom at 18, had some serious daddy issues, was emotionally unstable for most of my 20s, finances all over the place…I found every excuse and believed every lie that told me not trying was better than failing.
You serve the God who does the impossible.
Failing is how we learn. So why be afraid?
No one ever did anything great by staying in their comfort zone.
Lastly, we don’t need to be perfect to start.
My point is that it is OK to dream big with God. To dream in an untraditional and unexplainable way. We were meant to do that, to break barriers and standards for Jesus, and this looks different for you and for me. We love to limit God when it comes to ourselves, but yet we always see His greatness in the person next to us. That greatness is in both you and me.
Dig deep in your heart, find what God has deposited, and start. If you already know what it is or maybe are in that same place I was, where it didn’t let you rest and you can almost physically see yourself already walking in it, then congrats! That’s God at your door confirming He wants to begin.
Dig deep in your heart, find what God has deposited, and start.
For more articles on building faith and finding purpose, start here:
Now Is the Time to Ignite Your Confidence
Good Can Come When You Live in the Shadow
How to Get Honest About Your Dreams and Thrive!
3 Ways Positive Self-Talk Can Improve Your Life
Facing Broken Dreams and Finding a New One
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