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7 Things to Look for in a Man

7 Things to Look for in a Man

I recently read an article listing the top seven characteristics you should look for when hiring an employee. As I read through them, it occurred to me that these are exactly the things every girl seeking a life-long relationship should want. They are the qualities that make a marriage work, will build a healthy partnership, and can weather the storms of life.

It made me wonder why we don’t take the same well thought out, purposeful approach in finding marriage material as we do when hiring our next assistant. So let me just share with you these seven qualities that make a great employee and are equally important in the arena of dating relationships. Not cuteness, a great car, or fun on a date, but the things that really matter:

1. Integrity. He can be trusted, he tells the truth and does what he says he will do.

2. Self-Awareness. He knows himself, he knows what his priorities are and what he believes, which will define the life he wants to live.

3. Suitability. He cares about and has the same life goals.

4. Adaptability to Change. Life throws curve balls, so if you both can’t move to catch them, someone’s going to get hit in the head.

5. Inner Drive. Nothing worse than having to push the other half of the relationship to make life better.

6. Grit. He doesn’t give up when life gets hard.

7. Ability to Wisely Compromise. Not talking about a wimp here, but one who knows how and when compromise is the road best traveled.

Remember this – you can’t fire a spouse or move them to another department. If they move, you’re loading the truck with them. So before the infatuation, the sweating palms, the text to your best friend, begin the relationship by conducting your own interview.

Instead of going out on a date, go out for coffee, ask questions, and then check the references. Use the same care every employer uses in the next hire. If you do, the next relationship you build will be with someone capable of building it with you.

Want more from Darlene on picking a guy? Don’t miss Life’s Fairy Tale7 Dating Tips for Successful Relationshipsand After Years of Dating, Should You Keep Waiting?.


Darlene, President of The Grit and Grace Project, is crazy enough to jump in the deep end then realize she may not have a clue where she’s landed. She has spent her adult life juggling careers in the music business, been an author, a video producer, and also cared for her family ... some days drowning, other days believing she’s capable of synchronized swimming.

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