When to Leave a Job That Is No Longer Serving You

For years, I thought chasing a higher title and a promotion was the only way to validate myself, to prove my worth to loved ones and the corporate company I worked for. I quickly fell into the rhythm of hustle culture: My main and only focus was giving my job my all. I devoted every ounce of alone time to being the best of the best and showing others I was capable.

Maybe, in some way, it was to prove to myself that I could be successful when so many others in my life told me I never would be. My time with my kids suffered, my friendships suffered, my personal life was nonexistent and my health began to deteriorate. I could never get enough sleep, and spiking stress levels led to constant doctor visits for medication adjustments. I began having heart problems, breaking out in hives randomly, and having panic attacks more and more.

When hustling takes a toll

I knew I had to slow down and stop working on vacations, after hours, and even during times I was admitted in the hospital. I had to find a balance, I had to set those boundaries for myself. When I begin to do this I would slowly start to feel better, but then things would fall apart at work. Meetings quickly turned into critiques of “What is going on? Your numbers aren’t doing well anymore. You need to get them back up” and “You need more confidence in yourself.”

I quickly fell back into needing to validate myself. My inner child began screaming, “But look at what I have done; I am enough.” My mental health began to suffer tremendously, and in turn, my physical health got even worse. At this point I had two different cardiologists, a gastroenterologist, a hormone doctor, an OB Specialist, my normal physician, a therapist and a life coach. But I just kept getting worse, all at 38 years old.

One of the craziest parts to me was that I am a pretty confident woman. I have learned through a lot of trauma, healing, and learning to love myself. I was very good at my job and at one point I had truly loved it. S what was really going on with me? Why was I suffering and going through this all as I was?

It didn’t take me long to realize it was the level of stress I was carrying. I never took time for myself, and I felt like I was slacking as a mother, friend, daughter, and well everything else in life.

When to leave a job that’s no longer serving you

That is when I began to ask myself what I am doing all this for? Money is great and so is stability. But in the corporate world. it is easy to let the title, money, and accomplishments become toxic. That’s where I was, and it was my breaking point.

There would be no money if my health failed so much that my heart kept getting worse. There is no point in all the money if I can’t enjoy life with my kids. The stress was going to cause me to lose it all.

For a year, I began looking for other opportunities. One day while doom scrolling on Facebook, I came across a building that was for sale in my town. I have loved this building and location for as long as I can remember. So then I decided to buy it. I was going to make my “when I retire” dream of owning an art gallery a reality much sooner than I ever thought would be possible.

Everything aligned so flawlessly. I saw the building the day it listed, made my offer, and we closed with the title company 12 days later. That never happens.

When going into this, I planned to stay at my full-time job until the art gallery was ready and open. With multiple changes and shifts within my corporation in a very short matter of time, on top of being asked to do some things I did not agree with and knew would end poorly, the waiting didn’t last long. One day I decided enough was enough. I could no longer stay where I was. I was no longer willing to let my job rule my life in a way that made me sick and so unhappy while being undervalued.

Stay open to the “what if” opportunities

That brings us to today. I am just a few months shy of 40, a single mama to three amazing boys, and working to open an art gallery in my town’s downtown historical area. It is a small town, but adding this gem will introduce a space for creative minds to gather. I hope it’s a place that not only brightens our town but the hearts of each and every person who enters.

I was no longer willing to let my job rule my life in a way that made me sick and so unhappy while being undervalued.

If you are at a point in life where you are questioning your next step, wondering when to leave a job, and looking at other options, I recommend weighing the pros and cons. Make a plan. Then take the leap and go for it! Give it your all, sis, and don’t look back. We could “what if?” ourselves to a point of paralyzation, but I must ask you: What would you lose if you tried? What would you regret if you didn’t try?

It doesn’t matter your age some of the most successful people in history didn’t start until after 40. Take the chance and bet on yourself. I am claiming this next chapter of my life as “Take Flight.”

—
If you’re not in a place where you can leave your toxic job just yet, consider leadership coach Jenni Catron’s tips for positively influencing the workplace culture: Stuck in a Toxic Work Culture? 6 Ways to Make it Better