Self Worth

Every woman is valuable & worthy, but sometimes we struggle to overcome our insecurities. Here are great reads to help you discover your inherent self worth & how to live in it. #gritandgracelife

To the Mom Lacking Self-Confidence: Do This

To the Mom Lacking Self-Confidence: Do This

To the woman lacking self-confidence, it can appear as though everyone around her is acing life with flying colors. She might tend to second-guess her decisions constantly. She often battles a distorted, negative view of herself. When she becomes a mom, her confidence levels soar one minute and then reach unprecedented lows the next if her self-worth depends on her parenting skills. I know because I am that woman. To All the Women Lacking Self-Confidence I’m probably the least qualified person to dish out advice regarding confidence (see the irony there!). As one all-too-familiar with the aforementioned internal musings and mindsets, my self-confidence has been on shaky grounds for much of my adolescent and adult life. The same nervous way I’d present a […]

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When You Don't Feel Blessed as a Mother

When You Don’t Feel Blessed as a Mother

Have you ever had those days where you feel like everything is working out? You slept well the night before. You woke up before your kids and actually got a hot cup of coffee down. Your hair falls exactly the right way and your favorite Cracker Barrel t-shirt is wearing just right (okay, that last one might be all me). But it’s amazing, right? I know those days are few and far between but aren’t they glorious? Of course they are! Those are the type of days when people without kids start to fantasize about what it would be like, saying things like, “Wouldn’t it be nice to start a family? Let’s have one boy and one girl, exactly 18 months apart

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Advice for the Woman Who’s Not Happy in Front of the Mirror

Advice for the Woman Who’s Not Happy in Front of the Mirror

My mother had me late in life. So, by the time I was 12, she was nearing the magic age of 50. I remember sitting in her bedroom while she dressed in the mornings. We would talk about my plans for the day. And as I sat there, my mind would drift, “I wonder if I’ll look like my mom when I grow up?” She was a small-framed, almost frail, woman, with what she endearingly called her “baby belly pouch.” It hung right above her panty-line. I can remember she always tried to hide as she dressed almost like she was just a little embarrassed or uncomfortable for my 12-year-old eyes to see her nakedness. Her behavior left an impression on my

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You Don’t Have to Carry Your Failures Anymore

You Don’t Have to Carry Your Failures Anymore

A friend still cleans her adult son’s car when he stops by, and I can’t say I blame her. She always finds a stash of used lunch bags and backpacks culturing food, dirty laundry, and oodles of cash! And it got me thinking, haven’t we all found a bit of ‘yuck’ in our packs? I’ve heard the analogy that each of us carries an emotional backpack on our life’s journey. Our pack holds the essentials of living a meaningful life, kind of like the ‘All I really need to know I learned in Kindergarten’ idea. What’s In Your Life Backpack? Unlike the kindergarten credo, our backpack also carries memories, failures, burdens, and misconceptions we’ve picked up along the way. Our experiences, emotions,

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just-because-she's-pretty-doesnt-mean-youre-not

Just Because She’s Pretty, Doesn’t Mean You’re Not

(Listen to the audio version of this article here.) Do you have a friend who’s so beautiful that sometimes you find yourself staring, admiring? How about one who lives off of donuts and never lifts more than her purse but somehow maintains the body of a supermodel? Maybe you have a friend who always gets what she wants, and everything seems to go her way. Or what about your funny, charismatic friend who lights up a room and makes even strangers feel like they’ve been life-long friends? Have you ever noticed your friend’s beauty, talents, opportunities, or life as a whole and then suddenly felt like you got the short end of the stick? It’s not a fun place to be, and

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How to Find Your Worth In a Counterfeit World

How to Find Your Worth In a Counterfeit World

(Listen to the audio version of this article here.) I loved to play dress-up as a girl. I’d steal away to my stepmother’s closet and search out the highest heels, the longest string of 80s chunky beads, and the tiny samples of lipstick that she saved from Avon orders. If I was lucky, I’d also find the plastic tiara that somehow ended up in the toy box from a distant prom or Halloween costume.  There is a musty photograph of me somewhere smiling, head turned to one side trying to keep that crown from slipping off my blonde bobblehead. While memories of my childhood are patchy, like Swiss cheese, this one remains. Perhaps, because it has been captured in still life. Perhaps,

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Men and Women Equal Not Identicial

Men and Women Are Equal, but Not Identical

From the first moment a little girl announces, “When I grow up I’m gonna be a…” her parents tell her that she certainly will be. She can do whatever she dreams, and that’s true. If she loves sports—they’re all available. Education? Any field of study is obtainable. Career path? There is none blocked. This generation has all the “equal rights” created by the resolute females of the 20th century. Courageous ladies desiring the privilege to vote, to pursue higher education, and to have careers that matched their talents fought this battle. They changed our world. It is them we should thank for giving our daughters a future without limitations. Yet, as each daughter enters her teen years, most realize that the level playing field of opportunity

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If Your Kid is Being Bad, Does That Make You a Bad Mom 2

Your Bad Kid Doesn’t Make You a Bad Mom

You have just received your first phone call, the one every mother dreads and hopes to never receive. The preschool wants you to know that your child is hitting or biting or kicking. That little guy or girl, who has never shown this behavior before, has apparently turned into the class tyrant. It was in kindergarten when my daughter demonstrated her prowess in tormenting others. I dropped this sweet, little dressed up diva at her elementary school and all was going relatively well for the first few months. Then I received my first phone call. She had kicked a little boy. This led to discussion, punishment, and resolution. A week went by and then I got the next call; she had hit another student.

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Want-to-Be-a-Woman-of-Virtue-Remember-These-4-Things

Want to Be a Woman of Virtue? Remember These 4 Things…

Several years ago, the school where my husband and I taught asked us to give the Baccalaureate speeches at the graduation festivities. This was extra special since it was the first graduating class in the school’s history, and it’s a privilege we still talk about to this day! We grew to love these kids as our own. We taught and coached them, had them over for dinner in our home, celebrated successes, and consoled through failures. It’s neat to see how God has worked things out, and now we are not only “former teachers” but friends with many of them. During the years we had with them, we focused on teaching them about life because they were all about to enter into

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This Grit and Grace Life Podcast

How Do I Begin to Heal from Past Emotional Hurt? with Elizabeth Bristol -186

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | Android | TuneIn | RSS | MorePart of growing older—and being human—is learning how to recognize and manage our emotions in a healthy way. Our emotions have the power to help us grow, but they can also hold us back, especially when we’ve been hurt by others in the past. Elizabeth Bristol joins Darlene Brock and Julie Bender on this week’s podcast episode to share how she overcame her past emotional hurt. Elizabeth dealt with heartache and traumatic situations, including rape and drug use. After years of feeling stagnant in her pain, God prompted her to write down her story. It was only after she faced the pain of her past head-on and

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True Purpose Is Found in How We Care for Others

I watch as a woman I dearly treasure is overtaken by the stronghold of dementia, and I resign to the fact that none of us has control or the ability to change this course. Repeated stories and angry outbursts, followed by confusion—this has become the norm for this strong, kind, and loving lady. While these are not the actions of the aunt who has impacted my life so significantly, it’s where she finds herself in the twilight of her life. But my heart doesn’t stay where she is today. Instead, it leads me to the actions throughout her life. The deep and constant investment she made in mine. These will always be part of my treasured memories, keeping residence in my heart.

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5 Quotes That Will Encourage You, Working (Super) Mom

5 Quotes That Will Encourage You, Working (Super) Mom

Working moms do it all—but it’s hard! The struggle to find work and life balance is real, but in the end, what really matters is that you tried your best. At least, that’s what I’ve been told from the women who’ve seen it through. One thing I know that all of us working moms could use is a little encouragement. Just a quick note that says, “Hey, I see you. I see all of the obstacles you overcome every day. It’s not always flawless, but you put your heart and soul into it. You are a strong woman, and you’re a good mom.” So, working mom, these 5 quotes that will encourage you: “I think every working mom probably feels the same thing:

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Social Media Is Impacting My Child—What Can I Do About It?

Social Media Is Impacting My Child—What Can I Do About It?

One morning as I sat sipping my coffee for the glorious 10 minutes before my little ones wobble out of their rooms, I opened my phone to an article about school closings. There was going to be a return to virtual classes in many areas of the country because of threats of school violence on the social media platform Tik Tok (the one where kids do dancing that they’ve rehearsed for hours in front of a mirror) and other social media. I read about how social media threats were causing many teachers and students to fear for their lives. I turned to my husband and shared the headline. “How can this be?” I asked incredulous. “School shootings being talked about on social

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The Grass Is Always Greener: Learn to Love Who You Are

The Grass Is Always Greener: Learning to Love Who You Are

I’m about to make a shocking statement. Are you ready? Women are so hard on themselves. We know this already, right? We’re expected to be a size 2 but cook like Paula Deen. We’re expected to keep the house clean, tend to the children, keep a steady stream of income, and meet all of society’s (unrealistic) ideals of feminine perfection. We have social media feeds to keep fresh, friends to impress, and a whole slew of fellow women we need to prove our adequacy to. (Side note: Friends you have to impress aren’t true friends.) The demands are real. And true to our nature, we often internalize most of the pressure. We take it upon ourselves to police our own actions and

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This Grit and Grace Life Podcast

Do You Ever Feel Like You’re Not Enough? with Jodi Shultz 172

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | Android | TuneIn | RSS | MoreWomen have accomplished some pretty incredible things throughout history. It was women that patented windshield wipers, disposable diapers, non-reflective glass and a host of other products that benefit us to this day. And that’s just a glimpse into the life changing achievements we’ve made. Yet, it’s not uncommon for us to feel as though we’re not enough. We question our value when we see other women who are prettier, doing it better, or seem to be winning at life.  Grit and Grace Life writer Jodi Shultz joins Darlene Brock and Julie Bender to discuss this epidemic. Jodi recalls a time in her life when she felt like

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This Grit and Grace Life Podcast

Can You Embrace Your Femininity In a World That’s Against It? – 171

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | Android | TuneIn | RSS | MoreIt’s not uncommon in our world today to hear mixed messages on the subject of gender. Suddenly, the distinctions between men and women are blurred, and our expressions of femininity and masculinity are dismissed as being outdated, social constructs.  But Grit and Grace Life believes differently. Darlene Brock and Julie Bender sit down for an expressive discussion about these gender wars, and instead urge women to celebrate the traits that make them uniquely female. We can thrive in the natural characteristics that make us who and what we are and embrace them. There’s nothing wrong with being female—in fact, it’s a superpower! Quote of the episode: “I

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Communicate like a cat

Communicate like a Cat: Be Direct and Don’t Be Timid

“Meow!” It is 6:45 a.m. and Snickers, my chunky tuxedo cat, has his face on my face, yelling at me to get out of bed so he can have breakfast. My cat fascinates me with his strict schedule. He will never fail to tell me when it is time to eat, when he wants to go on the patio, and when I need to clean his litter box. Snickers is not afraid to express his wants and needs. He will lay on my chest while I am playing Candy Crush on my phone because he needs attention and feels that is his best way of telling me. As cute and humorous as my kitty is, I admire the fearless attitude Snickers portrays. I

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