Motherhood Challenges Need a Grit and Grace Life

How to Be a #Girlmom

Being a #girlmom isn’t easy. Being a #boymom obviously has its challenges and surprises, and you have to be super tough to be a boy mom. After all, you are raising boys who turn into men and lead the world, lead their families, and you have to somehow teach them to do it faster than at the pace of a snail. But to be a girl mom, you have to know every possible emotion for all possible scenarios. You have to be prepared for them all. It’s fun, challenging, dramatic (in every sense of the word), terrifying, amusing, and invaluable. You might not be a girl mom, but you may one day be the girl mom-in-law. Nothing can take the place of a […]

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Should You Train Or Discipline Your Child?

By Dawn Seabolt / Motherhood

I have been wrestling with the word “discipline” lately. The actual dictionary definition is, “the practice of training people to obey rules or a code of behavior, using punishment to correct disobedience.” Really? When I think of discipline, I guess I think of being disciplined as doing what is expected, not being out of line. But using punishment is not exactly how I feel we should teach our kids to behave. I like to think of the word “train” instead. We set the example, we encourage the positive behavior, and we teach and point out consequences of negative behavior. Modeling the behavior that you expect sounds so obvious, but it isn’t easy. Here’s an example of how this awareness played out in our

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10 Ways to Advocate for Your Special Needs Child

By Geinene Carson / Motherhood

As parents, we are all aware of the need to advocate for our children. But, when you have a special needs child, the stakes seem that much higher considering the assistance you will inevitably need to face the extra challenges. Special education services and resources can be limited and in order to access them, as well as the obscene amount of finances they often demand, it will require tenacity not to mention information and skills. My determination to see my daughter’s needs met collided hard with the reality of a broken system. Files get lost, phone calls are not returned, valid needs get denied, and red tape is everywhere. In response to my expressed frustration, people often told me, “The squeaky wheel

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You Don’t Have to Be Perfect to Be a Great Mom

By Darlene Brock / Motherhood

We don’t believe in superhero capes here at The Grit and Grace Project. That’s not to say we aren’t ever superheroes; we absolutely are. We do everything; Earn the paycheck, dry the tears, mow the lawn, balance the budget, cook the meals, and even fix the toilet. But one thing we don’t need to do is to be perfect! It’s something many of us expect from ourselves, but I’m telling you from first-hand knowledge, it is absolutely not necessary. So be encouraged, Mama! One of the worst places to feel this perfection pressure is in the role of mom. We become quite convinced that if we do not meet every need our child has, prevent all cuts, bruises, or hurt of any kind, and keep them

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What it’s Like to Be the Mom of a Multi-Racial Family

By Jodi Castronova / Purpose, Motherhood

I have been given the incredible opportunity to be a part of a multi-racial family. The role I have been chosen for is “mother.” My husband and I have two biological children: a charming boy (now 20 years old), and a creative girl (now 17 years old). We have adopted two children: a charismatic boy from Haiti (now 12 years old) and a corybantic girl from our hometown (now 3 years old). Yes, I had to look up that word, but it seemed to fit her well! “Wild or unrestrained, especially in pursuit of pleasure.” We have one foster baby, the cutie patootie (Urban dictionary definition: “someone so cute that the word cute itself has to morph into something cuter”), who is

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To First-Time Moms-to-Be, From a 7-Week Mom

By Jordan Hawkins / Motherhood

I did it, y’all. I survived the first six weeks… I choose the word survive because that’s exactly what you will do for the first six weeks of your very first child’s infant life. I sit here and look at my son, Wyatt, who turns seven weeks old tomorrow and tear up a little bit. For one, I found out today that he has his first cold. Poor buddy, he’s so small. Somehow though, I have found strength from having survived these first few weeks and feel confident to battle this first cold by his side. I think of other firsts that we’ve shared so far… The first time I held him in my arms. I was shaking like a leaf on a tree

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A Helpful Tool for When Your Kids Are Frustrating You

By Dawn Seabolt / Motherhood

What are some things that bother you about your kids? Things that get on your nerves, things that scare you, things that embarrass you? What is the first thing that comes to mind? I have to admit, for me it is often the petty things. I just mopped (for the first time in a month) and they spill milk all over the floor. They unintentionally break the new toy the day after they receive it, or maybe even the same day if we’re talking about one of mine. They are a block away from home in their underwear, pushing a beach cart. They do not know how to talk at a normal volume. These things are annoying, sometimes embarrassing, but they are

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Dear Parents of Millennials: It’s Time to Stop It

By Teresa Christian / Work & Money, Best Of, Motherhood

Dear sweet, sweet parents of Millennials (those precious little snowflakes born around 1980-2000, give or take a year or two) As the parent of two Millennials myself, and a Human Resources professional, I have a few words of advice for you: Let. Them. Go. I routinely read in HR career magazines and blog stories about how parents step in on behalf of their children. We’ve been doing that their entire lives, and it seems that it’s too difficult to quit. Here are examples I recently read. A father called his son’s employer to ask that his son be given a pay increase. A mom called to say that her child was sick and unable to come to an interview. Another parent called

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7 Tips For Battling Baby Blues

By Jennifer Grassman / Motherhood

Baby Blues and Postpartum Depression (PPD) are very common after the birth of a beautiful new infant. You’d think this would be a magical time of snuggles, bottles, and miniature clothes–and it is–but it’s also a time of rapid life transition and physically demanding recovery. A combination of sleep deprivation, drastic hormonal changes, the pain and discomfort of healing from childbirth, and the demands of caring for a tiny little person can easily combine to create a perfect storm and leave you feeling absolutely miserable. As soon as you begin feeling overwhelmed, sad, anxious, or stressed, it’s important to address the issue right away so it doesn’t get worse or tarnish this special time with your precious little baby. 1. Tell Your Doctor.

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Life After Skylar

By Ashley Jones / Motherhood, Best Of

This is part three of a four part series of a young mother’s story. We were so captivated by her journey we knew you would be too. Read the first two sections of the series, here: Part 1 Life Before Skylar and Part 2 Life With Skylar. After losing my daughter, and being intentional about experiencing the full depth of pain that came with it, I was questioning my decision to avoid anti-depressants. The heartbreak was too much. It was like that time when I was in the middle of hard labor and told my husband and my doula I wanted an epidural… and they told me the next contraction was coming and I needed to breathe deep, pretending not to hear me. I wanted

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Parenting Adult Children—The Great Shift of Motherhood

By Darlene Brock / Motherhood

There is a seismic shift that occurs somewhere between high school graduation and the “pay your own rent” season in every parent and child’s life. This human, who went from underfoot toddler to challenging teen, is suddenly out the door, certain they are equipped with everything they need to be a “grown-up.” As you watch them confidently stride forward, you realize they have no idea that you’re still trying to figure that one out! But you have spent the last 18+ years getting them ready for this transition, so they are, probably, equipped well enough. The mother-child roles are changing, and it’s a good thing. Walking alongside a healthy, productive adult, who was once that baby in your arms, is a joyful,

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How Boys Show Love

By Kitti Murray / Motherhood

Have you ever wondered if your boy loves you? They do, despite what meets the eye. Boys simply express love in their own, unique way… With a plastic snake, that’s how a boy loves. He wraps it around the milk jug in the refrigerator. Or puts it under your pillow so you’ll find it in your most unwary, weary moment. A boy’s affection is kinetic and sneaky like that. When a 300-pound homeless man slugs you in the face in broad daylight, on a sidewalk in Manhattan, while you’re working there. And that night your 6-year-old calls you at your hotel to ask if you got a good look at the man. And you say yes, he says: good, I’m coming up

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Comforting Thoughts For Moms on Rough Days

By Jennifer Grassman / Motherhood

We’ve all had bad days. For me, personally, the best way to cope has been to find some inner peace. My kids are calmer when I’m calmer. My husband is less anxious when I’m relaxed. The phrase, “If momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy,” has been proven in our home time and time again. Here are a few thoughts I have found comforting on bad days: “This too shall pass.” Tomorrow, today will be a memory. Next week, you might even be able to laugh about it. “I am loved.” When your children scream at you and pitch temper tantrums, remember that you are loved, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now. “I’m their Mom, not their friend.” Disciplining your

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5 Tips for Managing the Teen in Your Life

By Darlene Brock / Motherhood

It’s somewhere between middle school and high school that parents become dumb as a rock. That little face that used to look at us adoringly, believing every word we said, often develops deaf ears, rolling eyes, and sighs that last 14 minutes. We used to be so smart, but suddenly that is a thing of the past. At least, according to these growing hormonal humans. What’s a parent to do? 1. Realize that independence is a good thing. You don’t want a 30-year-old living at home. These are the years they need to begin standing on their own. 2. Don’t just make rules; create conversations. Boundaries are important, but understanding their challenges and adapting the rules when necessary is vital. 3. Give

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When You Want to Completely Change Your Parenting Style

By Dawn Seabolt / Motherhood

When my husband and I became parents, we had big plans about how we were going to mold and shape our children into respectful and respectable little people. We have now been parents for 10 years, and I have to admit we have learned more and become better parents in the past two than we did in the first eight. Two years ago we added to our family by adopting a 7-year-old boy from China. Adopting an older child from a difficult past means reading lots of books on trauma, attachment issues and the brain. Luckily, I have a great interest in these subjects, so the learning is fun. Putting the principles we’ve learned into practice with patience and grace is not

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7 Things Your Daughter Needs for Back to School

By Rachel Graham / Motherhood

You might think this list would be compiled of back to school shopping items or handy gadgets, but we think these points are way more effective for her personal success. 1. A self esteem boost. Tell her how proud you are of her and how much you believe in her. Let her throw a back-to-school party with all of her friends and show her how great the year is going to be. 2. An understanding of her abilities. Invest in something like a Myers-Briggs personality assessment (there are plenty of free online links or “dummy” versions) or a strengths finder book or course so that she can work to improve her weaknesses and grow her strengths. Have her meet with someone who is similar

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Back to School Clothes: 10 Different Ways to Save Money

By Clare Marlow / Work & Money, Motherhood

It’s still summer, your days ripe with swimming and popsicles and vacations, and then you get it … a reminder. Whether it’s from your kids’ school about their uniform requirements or you randomly look at the calendar and realize the days are waning. Before the idea of school preparation ruins the rest of your lazy days and makes you start pinching pennies on summer fun, don’t panic. There are a number of options for saving whether it’s on school uniforms, and even on those designer jeans your teenager is clamoring for: • First clean the closet to find the clothing items that aren’t worn out. For the ones that still fit make a list of possible tops or bottoms to make a fresh

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