Purpose

pur·pose

/ˈpərpəs/

This is the journey to define your gifts and talents to fulfill your unique calling—embracing who you are to help determine the roles only you can fill. It is the catalyst for doing your best, imperfectly so, each day in every area of life.”

Do High School Girls Want to Be Sophisticated Ladies?

Do High School Girls Want to Be Sophisticated Ladies?

“Hold your head high when you walk.” “Make sure your skirt and shirt are pulled down.” “Don’t be louder than a boy.” “Cross your legs when you sit in a skirt.” “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” “At times, it’s OK to be seen and not heard.” “Make eye contact and say ‘yes ma’am’ and ‘yes sir’.” “Why buy the cow when the milk is free?” “Say what you mean and mean what you say.” “Girls who talk about other girls will most likely talk about you too.” “Always act like a lady.” These are just a few of the simple lessons in life I remember my mom teaching me as a young girl. They […]

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This Grit and Grace Life Podcast

Life Behind the Mic with Julie and Dar – 223

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | Android | TuneIn | RSS | MoreWish you could go back in time and do something differently? We all do! Unfortunately, until time machines are manufactured, we can’t do anything about the past but reflect—and that’s often where we learn the most about who we are and where we want to go from here. This week, Darlene Brock and Julie Bender reunite after several months apart to catch up, swap stories about life behind the mic, and share wisdom they’ve gleaned over the last few years. In an inspiring display of vulnerability, the duo look back at moments in their lives that they wish they’d approached differently: everything from fashion choices and what

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Where Can I Find the Purpose of Life?

Where Can I Find the Purpose of Life?

(Listen to the audio version of this article here.) It started when I was 19: a sudden heaviness in my lungs and edginess I couldn’t shake. As soon as I left home, the weight of the world’s toughest questions began needling me like a three-year-old. The world’s pressures of womanhood becoming equally as frustrating. Suffocating. I’d lay in bed at night in angst and visualize scenes captured by the Hubble telescope: a galaxy, a multitude of galaxies, that speak to the infinite. I’d think about the world and its enormity. The endless possibilities. And then I’d ponder this strange reality, in contrast: the one where I, a woman, had a little path to find. A way. A purpose. I couldn’t help but

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Need to Stop Procrastinating How to Eat Your Frog

Need to Stop Procrastinating? How to Eat Your Frog

Chances are, you probably have a few frogs you need to eat today (or need stop procrastinating). No, I’m not referring to the actual amphibians (though I’m willing to try the supposed delicacy of frog legs) but rather the metaphorical ones that Mark Twain famously referred to when he said, “If it’s your job to eat a frog, it’s best to do it first thing in the morning. And if it’s your job to eat two frogs, it’s best to eat the biggest one first.” What are the frogs exactly, you ask? Simply put, the frogs are the things you don’t want to do, but actually need to do. Now, if you are a woman who tends to put off the hard

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How a Simple Straw Helped a Homeless Man, and Impacted Me

A Simple Straw, a Homeless Man, and an Impacted Life

A few years ago I was cleaning out my car and happened upon a still-wrapped straw from a fast-food place. I debated throwing it away, but I ultimately decided to keep it “just in case.” I put the straw in the side pocket of my door and forgot about it. Fast forward to one week later. Essentially on a whim and a prayer, my entrepreneurial father decided to sell eclipse glasses to meet the demand prior to the lunar eclipse. He quickly involved me in the process, which resulted in a handful of people asking to meet somewhere so they could buy a few pairs. On one such day, I met a couple of people at Publix, and then a homeless man.

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Finding Purpose When Another Door Closes

Finding Purpose When Another Door Closes

It was a Friday afternoon, long after the rest of the staff had left. The celebration was over and the building was still and quiet.  I walked to my office and leaned against the doorway, cardboard box in hand. I thought about the years spent within these four walls, the conversations, the accomplishments, and the many challenges. A career ended far too soon.  I spent the next few minutes packing years’ worth of memories into the box, glanced fondly out the window, walked out the office, down the hallway, and out the building—the front door closing behind me. I can vividly remember the feeling of cold air hitting my face as I stepped off the sidewalk. It was November, a fitting month

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a monarch butterfly rests on colorful flowers, a symbol of the adventure in everyday

There’s Adventure In Everyday—Here’s How to Find It

A friend graciously let us stay in their mountain home for a week. My husband loves the mountains and has the facial hair and four wheel drive to prove it. I love adventure and so we headed north. The home, situated at the top of several winding, icy, muddy and unpaved roads  made it impossible for some of the other cars to make it up the precipice. Since ours had four-wheel drive, I often served as the shuttle, from their cars parked near the highway to the few miles up. Straight up.  I hardly minded, because every time I turned a corner (which was often), I found each view more majestic than the next. How could someone not be impressed and in awe?

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I Changed My Mind—Change Can Be the Right Thing to Do article graphic

I Changed My Mind; Change Can Be the Right Thing to Do

We recently decided to pull our twins out of school and homeschool them for 4th grade in an effort to preserve what’s left of their childhood. After our move across the country last summer, that was the one aspect of all of it that I kept having a hard time with: I did not have peace. As I get older, I am realizing more and more our gut is our compass. So, I changed my mind, and guess what? That’s okay. We can start off one way and decide that’s not for us and turn around mid-destination. Life allows U-turns. Starting Over We arrived in our new state last summer, and last fall was the first time I worked outside the home

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What Is the Magic of the Snowball Effect

What Is the Magic of the Snowball Effect?

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things. —Robert Brault Years ago, I was scheduled on a red eye from Hawaii to Houston. Shortly after I sat down in my seat, a middle-aged Japanese woman plopped down in the empty seat to my left. “Hello,” I smiled at her before sliding my headphones over my ears, the universal signal that I wasn’t up for conversing. It was close to midnight, after all. But the woman started engaging with me anyway. Not wanting to be rude, I took my headphones off and answered her questions while our plane barreled down the runway. Pretty soon, we were describing what our days consisted of and

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This Grit and Grace Life Podcast

It’s Independence Day—Are You an Independent Woman? – 217

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | Android | TuneIn | RSS | MoreHappy 4th of July! While we’re celebrating our nation’s independence and the individual freedoms over backyard cookouts and late-night fireworks, we also can’t help but wonder: What does it look like to be an independent woman? In this episode of This Grit and Grace Life, Darlene Brock and Julie Bender unpack the characteristics of an independent woman. They also discuss the importance of identifying your value outside of your job title or relationship status and, most importantly, how to channel confidence and find contentment in who you are. The independent woman is one who makes a difference because she knows what she brings to the table. Is

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Discover 5 AA Slogans That Bring Wisdom to Any Woman’s Life

Discover 5 AA Slogans That Bring Wisdom to Any Woman’s Life

My former chosen method of numbing pain included self-medicating with pills and toxic relationships. It’s taken years, open sharing and honest conversations, lots of therapy, and a few rock-bottom moments to set myself on a path of growth and healing. For many people who struggle with addiction, recovery programs like Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) have ignited a new way of life, and a newfound sense of identity and purpose. Yet, the programs practices aren’t just life-changing for its members alone—anyone can benefit from the organization’s principles, and steps. Some of the best life practices can be found in the AA slogans. These five AA slogans every woman can incorporate into her daily life! 1. One Day at a Time To take it one

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Is It a Midlife Crisis? Or a New Beginning?

Is It a Midlife Crisis? Or a New Beginning?

Not going to lie: I find the flaps of skin on my arms and the line etching itself into my forehead (that looks just like my mother’s) a bit concerning. Middle age snuck up on me like my husband likes to sneak up on me in the kitchen and pinch my rear. All of a sudden, I’m here. A part of me is elated, and a part of me is petrified. What if I am more than halfway through my life? Is this why the phrase “midlife crisis” was coined? Why men with sprinkles of white in their mustaches slink around car dealerships looking for the shining red muscle car? Why some veer a bit further and look for the other shiny

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creating a wellness vision

Why You Need a Wellness Vision and Your Guide to Creating One

I don’t remember any watershed or lightbulb moments that first prompted me to take a more proactive stance on the state of my health and create a wellness vision. However, I do remember what happened when I made the solemn vow to start treating myself with a little more TLC: absolutely nothing. Zip, zilch, nada. Because when I made that pledge to myself, I imagined willpower would be enough to align my actions with my words and that my quest toward greater wellness would unfold in a buttoned-up linear fashion. Sure, it was a bit delusional to think that the process would be seamless and easy. Instead, I did the whole two-steps-forward-four-steps-back dance. (And later learned that all my back peddling, overanalyzing,

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Anatomy of a Strong Woman

Anatomy of a Strong Woman

What makes a strong woman is touted in academia and social media; it’s displayed daily on almost every television network. The phrase is even currently awarded to those who are not biologically female. But I contend being born female is the only path to becoming a strong woman. Those are the women I admire and want to emulate. Today’s version of female strength is often exemplified by some of the angriest ladies I have ever encountered. I’m not sure that much of anything would make these women happy. They tell us we should demand respect, our rights, and equality (but oftentimes with an air of superiority). This is not to say that women cannot have a voice, that we are undeserving of respect,

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Quitting but not failing

When a Strong Woman is Quitting but not Failing

You’re reading this because there is something in your life that you have an inkling you need to let go of. Whether it’s a job, a relationship, a dream, or a life path, you know you really shouldn’t be involved in it anymore. It just doesn’t feel right, but you aren’t sure what to do about it. You may be quitting but not failing. I don’t know about you, but I have a million “don’t quit” mantras in my head that make quitting feel the same as failing. They all say that if I choose to end something in my life, I am a failure. When you think of yourself as a strong woman, quitter doesn’t play into that description. Having perseverance

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5 Steps for Setting Goals, Changing Dreams into Done

5 Steps for Setting Goals, Changing Dreams into Done

I absolutely love the start of each new year! A fresh start… a clean slate… wide open horizons… Pick your choice metaphor and embrace the new year’s energy with me for a minute. Fast forward to late January, and my motivation is waning. My guess is the same thing happens to you. In fact, statistics tell us that only 8% of us actually achieve the New Year resolutions we set! Our resolutions break down because we fail to create a plan to achieve them. In fact, rather than creating resolutions, I create goals that are important to me for the coming year. Goals vs. Resolutions It might seem like semantics to set goals versus resolutions, but here is the subtle difference between

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How Do I Know What Defines Me?

How Do I Know What Defines Me?

I am single. I am widowed. I am married. I am divorced. I am a mom. I have no children. I am a career woman. I stay at home. I am an artist. I am a cancer survivor. I have a doctorate. I finished high school. Are these really who we are? Or are they merely part of our journey, a title, or life experience that will demonstrate what we are made of? I, my friend, will passionately argue for the latter. In my 20s, I was a booking agent for musicians when I married my boss. No, it was not one of those torrid affairs in the workplace that you would read or hear about over your lunch break. He was

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