Create Healthy Relationships in Your Grit and Grace Life

Take It Easy—On Your Friends

Do you ever butt heads with some of your favorite people in the world? Those friends who hold a special place in your heart—who’ve cried with you when you cried, laughed alongside you at the craziness of life, and even chided you when you needed that extra kick… Let’s talk about keeping a great friendship alive. It doesn’t take a lot, even though sometimes it may seem like it does. Here are 5 things to remember for every friendship you want to hold onto: 1. You’re not a perfect friend. When you feel like you’ve been let down or disappointed by someone who you thought would never fail you, remember that friendship is a relationship between two imperfect people—and you are one of them. You […]

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6 Easy Ways to Spice Up Your Relationship Right Now

By Megan Miller / Relationships

I know what you’re thinking, but I’m not talking about the bedroom. I’m talking about the Groundhog Day cycle you find yourself in! I’ve noticed that my marriage feels most dull when I’m short on self-care, and I haven’t had quality time with my husband. Try some of these ideas to get you out of autopilot and into a passionate partnership. Switch Roles Maybe it’s time he cooks dinner, and you walk the dog? Whatever designated jobs you’ve assigned to one another, switch it up! You may surprise yourself with compassion and be able to relate better at the end of the day. Invest in His Passions Sometimes I flip on ESPN or Sportscenter during the day, so I can talk to

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My Really Different Kind of Family

By Ashby Duval / Best Of, Relationships

My new husband, my new baby, and my son from my first marriage just got back from visiting my dead husband’s parents on our vacation. Did you get all of that? Yeah, that’s a lot to take in so let me back up a bit. Six years and two months ago, my beautiful, gregarious, hilarious husband, Spencer, literally died in my arms. He was 34 years old, seemingly healthy and in shape, and there were absolutely no warning signs. He had an enlarged heart, and we had no idea. His entire family was visiting us in Florida from Minnesota for Mother’s Day. I was five and a half months pregnant with our first child. We were staying at the Hyatt Regency hotel with his

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You're-a-Piece-of-Work,-But-There's-Grace-for-You

A Difficult Relationship With Your Mom Can Make You Stronger

By Gina Fox / Relationships

My family pictures portrayed happy people who appeared to get along, but this was not always the case. I was a sick child, but my parents were always there for me when I was in the hospital. They supported everything I did from ballet to playing tennis. My relationship with my mother really changed during my teenage years. My mother suffered from bipolar disorder, which was difficult for me to experience. We were able to tolerate each other, even though she was hypercritical of everything I did. However, as the years went on, we weren’t able to be in the same room together without a fight breaking out. She began to fight me on every decision I made because they were not

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When Life Gives You Lemons, Reach Out to Your Friends

By Jennifer Schoonover / Relationships

In this life, the terrain is continually changing; we will climb mountains, skip through lush fields of wildflowers, traverse into deep valleys, and try to navigate our way through dry desert sand. Each with its own beauty and hardship. As difficult as these paths can be at times, we need to make sure we aren’t trying to go it alone. We should take our own advice. You know, what you tell your kids when they head out the door on an adventure, “Don’t go anywhere alone. Remember to use the buddy system.” Now don’t get me wrong, sometimes we need a little time out, some solitude, to do a little self-reflection and see where we should be showing ourselves some grace. Most of

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Why It’s No Good to Keep Score in Your Marriage

By Whitney Hsu / Relationships

My husband has one big rule for our marriage. Babe, if you’re reading this, I know you’d say it’s not a rule—perhaps more of a guideline. But for me, it’s a rule. If I don’t follow it, I go down an extremely unhealthy path, and I know it. So here’s the best “rule” or “guideline” I’ve ever heard for a husband-wife relationship: don’t keep score. No healthy relationship is seen as a game. The only reason you’d keep score is if it’s a game of some sort, and if you’re serious about it, you’d better not call it a game. Right? You might follow up with the fact that keeping a record of rights or wrongs is just not a good idea.

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How to Become a Better Listener in 5 Simple Steps

By Meaghan Dawson / Relationships

I am a mom of three children under the age of 10, so I’ve seen pretty much every animated movie created. Ever. My very favorite is The Lego Movie, though, and not solely because it’s got great animation, witty dialogue, and touching moments. Those are all great components, but it’s actually my favorite because of one tiny little line tucked into one tiny little scene that you’ll miss if you blink. This line is dreadfully funny, but it also hurts just a bit because, at least for me, it’s so true. It speaks directly to a problem we all have, every single one of us. And it’s poignant because in just a few sentences it tells the story of our modern day

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5 Ways You Can Revive a Stale Marriage

By Lydia McIntosh / Relationships

The other day I admitted to myself and my husband that I was not happy with our marriage. Saying the words out loud was difficult, and I was embarrassed for them to pass through my lips as I felt failure and disappointment weighing on me. The busy schedules, juggling parenting and marriage, as well as the feelings of neglect and uselessness drove my passionate love from firey to lukewarm in mere weeks. My relationship with my husband had become monotonous, selfish, and dull. A lack of stirred affections left me stale. I didn’t feel like a young, 20-something woman who garnered this crazy, undying love for her husband. I felt like a live-in nanny whose sole purpose was to take care of

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Take It Easy—On Your Man

By Darlene Brock / Relationships

Sometimes we can be a bit hard on the men in our lives, mostly because we don’t understand how they do life. The good news is that our genders are different. Understanding and appreciating those differences will help us relax. Whether it’s a boyfriend, boss, co-worker, son, or spouse, when we remember that they just think differently, it can simplify life and reduce conflict. So here are a few things to never forget when you are dealing with the opposite sex: 1. Men hear what we say, not what we mean. It’s movie night and you say you don’t care what you see, he believes you really don’t care—then immediately purchases tickets for the biggest action movie in the theater. 2. They want to

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12 Tips on Holding Your Ground with Grit and Grace

By Geinene Carson / Relationships

I used to be a quiet, more reserved person, only sharing my opinion or pleading my case when asked. Perhaps due to age, a shift in personality, being an artist, or advocating for a special needs child, I have become much more vocal. Life provides countless opportunities to practice speaking up for myself and others. No matter the cause—disputing unsatisfactory services, navigating misunderstandings with loved ones, confronting co-workers, or defending deserved rights—I am learning how to be both firm and respectful while pursuing my needs. Here are 12 tips on how to stand your ground firmly and respectfully: 1. Identify the issue. You cannot plead your case while uncertain of the real issue. So many misunderstandings are fueled by ambiguity and sheer emotion.

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Remember This When You Take Your Marriage For Granted

By Teresa Christian / Relationships

Author Lewis Smedes wrote, “To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.” Yet forgiveness is one of the most difficult of human actions. We think that by not forgiving someone who has hurt us that we are holding some sort of power over him, but this simply isn’t true. As a matter of fact, the exact opposite is true. Choosing not to forgive only leaves us powerless, bitter, and resentful. There is nothing more damaging to a marriage than choosing not to forgive, and nothing more healing than the act of forgiving. Marriages seem especially vulnerable to insensitivity and anger. Perhaps it’s because we’re with our husbands every day and begin to feel a sense

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Anne: A Sobering Story of Domestic Violence

By Karen DeVault / Relationships

Whenever I travel a certain stretch of highway near where I live, I think of her. Along that route is a wooded area with a pond that can be seen from the road. On a frigid December morning in 1979, her battered body was found there by people passing by, lying face down on the ice, wearing only a sock. Her name was Anne. She had been a high school classmate, part of our group of awkward kids from less affluent families who struggled to fit in. Anne was a quiet girl, introverted and at times painfully self-conscious. Her family lived in a mobile home park which at the time had a stigma of its own and some kids ridiculed her for it.

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Why It’s Important to Believe the Best About the Women Around You

By Stephanie Ramos / Relationships

Women comprise nearly fifty percent of the world’s population. With 7.6 billion people in the world, our total numbers are likely somewhere around 3.8 billion. We’re everywhere. We come in all ages, all ethnicities, and are found in every walk of life in every corner of the earth. We’re dynamic, complex, filled to the brim with mystery and passion. Some of the most remarkable individuals I know are women, and they encourage and drive me to grow in my own life as I watch them live theirs. I didn’t always think this way. To be honest, during late high school and college, the number of guy friends I had far outweighed the girl friends I had. I used to frequently say that

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How to Make a Happy Marriage, From a Divorced Single Mom

By Christi Anderson / Relationships

I was laying on the massage table chuckling instead of relaxing. I was chuckling at the fact that I had to pay someone to touch me. I mean, I sometimes pay my kids five bucks for a back massage, but that’s different. They don’t really want to do it and they don’t really care. They’ve never walked around looking and feeling as stiff as a 4×4, so how could they understand the necessity of a little back massage? As I got over my giggles and finally succumed to the relaxation, I had all these ideas running through my head about advice I needed to share ASAP. My first order of business is to share my thoughts on marriage (I’ll share my thoughts

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This Life Coach Shares How to Blend a Family

By Cherrie McBurney / Relationships

Ah yes, even now it pains me a little. The famed Norman Rockwell painting, which has been called by many names. For me it has always represented one thing. The Perfect Family. How I tried and tried with all my might to paint our family into this photo. I could feel the yearning to see our happy faces laughing and sharing a table and a beautiful life together along with grandparents, siblings, and close friends. Selfishness is at the bedrock of human nature and my resulting divorce had thrashed ugly lines in my longed-for painting that forever prevented us from sharing that family table together. But wait! All is not lost! Blended families offer incredible opportunities for self-discovery, growth, and new beginnings. Let’s

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Mix It Up and Try These Day Dates With Your Man

By Catie Welvaert / Relationships

Whether we’re in our first month of dating and learning each other or getting a night to ourselves after a long work week, date night is often our best night of the week for much-needed quality time with our man. The usual dinner, movies, and walks downtown can be a part of a fun routine, but I am the number one fan of starting the day together with a morning date. If you’re in need of a change and looking to try something new together, take to these ideas for a morning cup of romance! Here are 10 ideas for morning dates with your man: 1. Be early risers. Set your alarms and head to a wide open spot to watch the

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4 Truths About Being Friends With Benefits

By Megan Miller / Relationships

Before I was married I was FWB (friends with benefits) with a few guys and here’s why: I liked them, but they didn’t like me so I thought if I gave them benefits (compromised my physical boundaries) they would commit to me. I define friends with benefits as making physical and emotional compromises without an exclusive commitment. Ladies, you don’t have to be friends with benefits. You are worth the commitment, you are worth exclusivity, and you are worth a man who respects your boundaries. Here are some truths I learned about being FWB before I realized I was worth more: 1. You’re buying your own dinner. Lets be clear on friends with benefits. He’s not your boyfriend. That means you are physically giving yourself

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